Secrets, Silence and Solitude
by Eyrial
Summary: HGBZ Friendship can be found in the most unexpected of places. After the war the world is struggling to return to normal, but can the old house boundaries be thrown off or are the old resentments still there? Complete! Sequel is up, called Rippling Water!
1. First Encounter

Chapter 1: First Encounter

When I first met him all I wanted was to be alone, but his silent company gave me far more comfort than the solitude I craved ever could.

After Voldemort was defeated the 7th years were allowed back for another year to retake. Many people had left Hogwarts during that year of terror and no one sat their OWLs or NEWTs, there were many people who needed qualifications but due to last years horrors had not been able to get them. Everybody took their years again, because of the events in the outside world most people learned very little due to lack of concentration on the parts of both the teachers and the students so no one was going to suffer.

1st year would be a little bit larger than usual and a mix of different ages but the years intake was much smaller as it was mostly purebloods because many half bloods, muggle borns and their families had been wiped out. Many pupils had been murdered by Voldemort's followers or had died in the final battle so the train seemed much emptier and many people were mourning the loss of friends and relatives. The whole train had a sombre mood not the cheerful expectant one it usually had as it made its way to the start of the new school year.

It was on the train at the start of the year when I first found him. Every carriage was split into four six seat compartments, three seats on either side. I was sitting in a compartment with Harry, Ron, Ginny, Luna and Neville, the usual crowd. Voldemort had torn families and friends apart but the fear he caused and the jubilation at his death had brought many more together. Harry and Ginny were sitting close together and getting cosy, over the summer Neville and Luna had realised what many of us had noticed a long time ago, they would be an absolutely perfect couple. This left me facing Ron, the two couples on either side were murmuring to each other and occasionally kissing but there was an awkward silence between me and Ron.

Over the summer we had succumbed and become a couple after many years of possibility, but it didn't take me long to realise how wrong it felt. He was so cute and keen and we had loved each other for so long but when it came to it he was like a brother to me, I couldn't be with him because it felt like I was dating my brother. I was really embarrassed being around him because I didn't want to hurt him but eventually I broke it off. As we sat there in the carriage he avoided my eyes except every so often he shot me a heart broken look, wracked with guilt I couldn't take it anymore I got up and left. I searched frantically through the train for a place to be alone with my thoughts when I found it, one compartment that was completely empty apart from one boy sitting alone in the farthest corner lost in a book.

* * *

I couldn't face sitting in a compartment full of Slytherins. Malfoy, Pansy, Goyle, Nott and Millicent Bulstrode. Many lost their fathers when Voldemort went down, either dead or locked up in Azkaban, Malfoy was lucky not to be there himself. The mood was subdued but although Voldemort himself was gone it was clear they were all still full of hatred. It took much more that the death of Voldemort for them to stop believing that muggles and anyone who had anything to do with then were scum. It made me sick

I was careful not to give myself away; I never said anything against Voldemort. My mother was a fan of his. I was one of the few people who knew the secret of the sorting hat, that it read our minds and gave us our choice. I knew I would be out of place in Slytherin but it was better than to face the wrath of my family, being a disgraced son and an embarrassment to the Zabini family. I was rarely noticed, a made a point of talking to the popular people so no one would ever guess my feelings about Voldemort and the dark arts, but I generally kept to myself. I tried to be as inconspicuous as my mothers fame would let me and stayed alone not making any friends, dedicating myself to my studies in the library or by the lake.

I was sitting in the calm and quiet of my own compartment reading my favourite book, Jane Eyre. I was always careful to never let anyone see me read it as I had read it countless times and my copy was worn and battered. To the Slytherins it would be a filthy muggle book about filthy muggles written by a filthy muggle. But to me Jane Eyre is perfect, romantic and sad, it just makes me wish I had a girl like her. So just sat reading in peace.

I didn't notice her come in, it was only when she said "Jane Eyre, I love that book it's my favourite" that I guiltily looked up into a pair of hazel eyes filled with sadness. Just the sight of them made me want to hold her and tell her it was alright, just to provide some comfort. I just had an overwhelming urge to protect her from any kind of hurt, I quietly went back to my book wondering what just happened.


	2. Curiosity

Chapter 2: Curiousity 

I didn't leave the compartment for the rest of the journey, it was nice just to sit and get lost in my book forgetting all my problems. As I got into a carriage to take us the rest of the way to Hogwarts I noticed the Thestrals. We had learned about them several years ago just after Cedric's death but I'd never seen anyone die then. I looked around and noticed I wasn't the only person who had just had their first glimpse of these strange beasts, mine was not the only face filled with wonder. I had always wanted to know what Thestrals looked like but I had never wanted to see anyone die, I had never imagined then to be so curiously beautiful but so piercingly sad.

I climbed into the carriage and was joined by Harry, Ron, Ginny, Neville and Luna who immediately bombarded me with questions like "Where were you?" "Why did you go?" "Are you all right?" "Did we do something to upset you?" all except Ron who remained in stony silence. I mumbled something about wanting to be alone and they seemed satisfied but still concerned.

As we sat in silence thoughts and worries whirled around my head. I was worried me and Ron would never be the same again. What if I had ruined things forever and he never spoke to me again? Would he ever forgive me? I just couldn't bare how sad he was and how much I hurt yet I knew I could never have carried on being with him. Still at the same time I looked at Harry and Ginny, Neville and Luna and envied their closeness. I wanted that feeling of love and devotion, complete trust and inseparability. The only person I knew who wanted that with me was Ron and I just had no feelings for him beyond friendship and guilt.

The feast was noisy, despite loss of several teachers that had been loved by all the students, until McGonagall got up and began to say a few words. "As we all know last year was turbulent to say the least, this school, all its students and the whole world suffered under Voldemort's reign of terror and the evil acts his death eaters carried out. Many of us have lost friends and family, leaving behind gaps that can never be filled. This school lost many brave students who gave their lives to the noble cause of freeing the world from the violence of Voldemort and his death eaters. I would like to take this moment for us to remember all those who died, either in battle or murdered in cold blood. We should appreciate the gift that they gave us and live through the following years of the freedom they never lived to see to the full. We should work hard to achieve the best of our abilities at school and in our lives as a tribute to those who lost their lives. This is a year of joy and celebration as well as peace and mourning. You may now go up to your dormitories to rest in preparation for tomorrow and the start of your lessons."

I didn't think of him for a few days as I got caught up in the school routine, he was in all my classes I just didn't think of him on the train sitting quietly with his Jane Eyre. It wasn't until I saw him walk into the library that the memories of shared peace on the train resurfaced. I didn't no what he had been hiding from but just like me he had certainly been hiding from something.

* * *

The feast didn't go down too well with the Slytherins. McGonagall said too much about Voldemort and a reign of terror. Although they knew the rest of the school had never supported Voldemort there were many bitter mutterings. I hear several people saying the rest of the school didn't know what they had destroyed, how much they would have loved him if they had known what his plans would have done to wizard kind, real pure wizards. I just stayed quiet I didn't need to pretend I was angry because I was just at the Slytherins not McGonagall. I didn't say anything I wasn't ready to be killed just yet.

I lost myself in day to day routine, getting up an hour before the rest of the school so I could have peace while I got ready in the mornings, it was nice to feel free from everyone else and the pressure I was under. She was in all my classes, Ancient runes, Arithmancy, Potions, Transfiguration and Charms. I didn't think anything of but she had been kind on the train it was nice to know not everyone judged.Slytherin hated me because I was different from them. The rest of the school hated me because I was Slytherin.

I didn't know much about her only that she worked hard, I was clever too second in every class but she was always first beating me to the post every time. I knew and she was friends with Harry Potter but she didn't look happy, something had happened to her. Something had happened to most of the school last year but she was different

Malfoy caught me watching her as I was wondering what was wrong and how I could approach her, I wanted to be her friend. He started to laugh. "Honestly Blaise are you so desperate that you have started looking at mudbloods, because I know Millicent is looking and I am sure she would just love you. Why don't you ask her instead? Anything is better than that know it all."

"Malfoy I am not interested in Granger that I can assure you, I was just wondering how some one with a family like hers beats me in every class. As for Millicent thanks but no thanks, right now I want to concentrate on work and wipe the smile off Granger's face as she feels what it's like to come second for a change."

Well at least I was partly telling the truth I didn't like her in that way. I wanted to find out why she was so sad, I wanted to comfort her. She was hiding from something on the train that day just like me, I just wanted to know what. So thats why when I walked into the library and I saw her sitting all alone at a small table I went and sat down with her sitting exactly opposite.


	3. Stories

I went back to my work wondering if he had seen me or even knew who I was

I went back to my work wondering if he had seen me or even knew who I was. He had been in the slug club with me but I was with Ron then, if he even acknowledged me he probably thought I was just a stupid muggle born who liked a blood traitor. He was a Slytherin after all. I doubt my company meant anything to him on the train certainly not as much as his meant to me. Someone sat down on my table opposite me, I was annoyed as although I couldn't stop people sitting at my table I made it clear that they weren't wanted. I had chosen the smallest table in a secluded corner and spread all my work out so there was very little space. I hated working near other people, I always made sure I had finished before Harry and Ron started to work, I couldn't concentrate and I always got Es not Os in my work when I did. I looked up angrily to meet the deep swirling indigo pools of colour that were Blaise's eyes.

"Oh, hi" I said pleased but startled.

"Not so sad today I'm pleased to see." he replied "You had me worried on the train"

I was touched that he had noticed my mood and surprised to discover he was actually worried about me. I moved off some of my unused books so there was space for his. "You're doing the Ancient runes huh?" I said as I saw him open his book to a page covered in beautiful intricate letters. He grinned as I pulled back my arm to reveal the scroll I was translating onto. "I like the text we are translating onto at the moment; it's nice that we get to see what the muggles used to believe. The Norse myths are a nice break from wizarding texts written in that period. This particular story about Nornangest is very interesting, I like muggle religions, and most wizards I know have never even heard of God let alone know who he is. Where have you got to?"

"Oh, he's just been invited to King Olaf's court."

"That's where I am!" We both went back to the tricky text.

"Why were you sitting alone on the train, I thought you were friendly with the Slytherins. They didn't kick you out did they?"

"I could ask you the same thing, The Golden Trio sick of you are they." He retorted angrily

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you angry."

"No, I'm sorry I was out of line, I just get up tight about my reasons for spending my life alone. Generally when people ask me that they are trying to use it against me, The Slytherins can act civil, like no one in there house is an outsider, it's a different story in private, in the common room, the dungeons and the dorms."

"Oh, it's ok you don't have to answer, I'm being nosy, but I promise I would never tell."

"Fine but only if you tell me why you're so miserable."

"Ok, deal"

So he told me about his mum and how she had expected so much of him, to join the death eaters and rise through the ranks. How much he hated all of it, he had wanted to join the order but he would have been the first to be hunted down. How every day he had to hide his true feelings for Voldemort or be ripped apart by Slytherins still mourning his death. And worst of all how he felt like such a coward. "There are so many lives I could have saved, but they died because I was too scared to lose my own. I killed all those people because I am such a coward. I could have stood up for what I believed but I didn't, and I hate myself for that." He finished and looked at me expectantly but before he could ask I tried to comfort him

"Blaise it was not your fault, you were too young, we weren't allowed to fight, there was no point risking your life if you weren't allowed to fight back."

* * *

I don't know why I did it? I sat staring at the strange girl I barely knew who I had just told my life story to, my hopes, my fears, my shame and my secrets that I had never told anybody. What was it about her that had made me trust her so completely after a few lines of conversation and shared solitude? Did she have that affect on everybody or was it just me? Oh Merlin why did I just do that? She's going to think I'm going for sympathy with a sob story. What if she thinks I was making a move! I wasn't was I? Ok just calm down and ask her a question, I have fulfilled my part of the deal, it's her turn.

"So why are you so sad all the time?"

"Well it's only recently but it's because I screwed up, I let down one of my best friends and I don't think he'll ever forgive me."

"What happened?"

"During Voldemort's reign the fear brought many people together, they realised they should be happy while they could. That happened to Lupin and Tonks, sadly they both died. After he fell the relief brought many other people together. It was the fear that got me and Ron; we had fancied each other for years before we finally got together."

"What's the problem then? Is Harry upset?

"No Harry has Ginny, it's Ron. For a little it was great, what I had been waiting years for. Then I started to feel really awkward, he was to much like a brother to me. I couldn't carry on I had to end it. He still can't forgive me, he thinks I should never have started going out with him if I thought that it wouldn't work, he says I dumped him for no reason."

"Aww, he'll come round."

"No he wont, he refuses to talk to me, he keeps giving me these looks that either looks like he hates me or he's heart broken."

I sat looking at her, she looked so sad; it was terrible to see it. I wondered how anyone, let alone Ron who loved her, could let her get like this. How could anyone bear to see this girl so sad. Her huge hazel eyes were filled with tears, even her bushy hair seemed limp and miserable. I already hated this Ron.


	4. Friendship

I went up to the owlery to send a letter to my parents; I walked up to the tower thinking about Blaise

I went up to the owlery to send a letter to my parents; I walked up to the tower thinking about Blaise. He had been so nice about Ron, and his story had made me think how lucky I was. Even if Ron wasn't talking to me I had friends who cared about me, Harry, Ginny, Neville and Luna even if they were a bit preoccupied they always had time for me. I wanted to try and make Blaise feel like he had a friend, he had had such a lonely life. I wanted to show him the kindness he had missed out on and so deserved. He seemed so caring if only he had some one to care for.

I walked into the owlery and saw him instantly, fastening a letter to the leg of a fidgety owl. His straight dark hair ruffled by the wind howling through the glassless windows. The tips of his long fringe dangled in front of his liquid, indigo eyes. The tip of his tongue poked out of the corner of his mouth in concentration and he let out a grunt of frustration as the owl slipped out of his grasp again.

"Here let me." I said as I walked over. He jumped and spun around but smiled and relaxed when he saw who it was.

"Sure." he grinned "Be my guest but as you can see she's a real handful. She gets really excited at the prospect of a delivery. Don't you Sedna." He smiled as the owl rubbed her head against his hand. He moved aside and let me take over, the black owl instantly held still and I slipped the letter on. Just before I let her go Blaise noticed the letter I had brought.

"You can give her yours as well if you like, unless you have an owl of your own. Sedna's faster than all the school owls"

"Thanks the school owls are really irritable."

"No problem, she'll be glad of the chance to show of to a stranger. She's very vain she likes to live up to her name sake. I named her after an Inuit goddess."

"You should see Pig, he's tiny can barely hold a letter, but he's always really excited."

"Why aren't you using him?"

"He's Ron's owl. Harry's owl Hedwig is out on a delivery for him."

"Well you can borrow Sedna anytime."

"Thanks I will."

"Do you want to go somewhere?"

"Sure."

"Actually do you mind if I draw you?" He pulled out a black leather bound book with the words Blaise Zabini in gold neat handwriting. "I never go anywhere without my sketch book."

"Ok if you're sure you want a drawing of me, I'm hardly a beautiful model."

"Of course you are, but well I know we haven't talked much but you're the closest I've got to a true friend and I would like us to become friends eventually if you don't mind. I'm happy around you and I want a picture to remind me of that."

"Of course I'm your friend and I'm glad I make you happy, considering what you told me you deserve it. I'm glad to help."

* * *

Because she loved reading I wanted a drawing of her in the library doing just that. I told her to get a book that would absorb her so she would forget I was there and make her uncomfortable. She knew just the one. Jane Eyre. She skipped to her favourite part, the book opened onto the right page straight away. There were creases where she had read and re-read the same 100 pages.

She relaxed into her book and I sat opposite her at the small, round wooden table and started to draw. As always I began with her hair. I out lined the bush curls being careful to show where the light and shadows were so I could do a painting from looking at the sketch. That way I could have a coloured, talking moving image of her thought I knew it wouldn't be often that I would disturb her reading self. Next I drew her sloping shoulders and down into her arms, her elbows propped on the table as she supported her much loved book.

As I drew I thought about the girl in front of me, oblivious to the world around her. She had no idea how much these few encounters had meant to me, I had spent 18 years of my life unhappy and alone. She was part of the Golden Trio why would I just another person in her life mean as much to her when she had all her friends around her? Now that I thought I had found a friend, I was scared of friends before no matter how lonely I was. Where would I find a Slytherin who didn't love The Dark Lord or a Gryffindor, Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw who would see past my house? The house I had hated all my school life. Yet here she was, this intelligent girl.

Where I had tried to hide my knowledge in class, quietly getting high marks, she flaunted her brains, desperate to prove that you didn't need to have pureblood to be clever. How often I had seen this girl raise her hand triumphantly to correctly answer any question any teacher asked or working alone in the library, even when she was in The Slug Club I had taken no notice. I looked but I hadn't seen. How could I ever have known that this girl could become my friend and end my life of loneliness?

I had drawn the rest of her body, the book, the table and the shelves of books behind her, filling every detail, every glimmer of light, every faint shadow before I finally started on the face. Starting with her eyebrows following their curve down into her nose, drawing every freckle that dusted the bridge and her cheekbones. Next I drew her pink lips which were slightly parted as she stared transfixed by the much loved words covering the page in front of her. The tiny shadows cast by her bottom lip, her chin that was not to sharp and not to round, the perfect balance of the two, and her ears peeking out from her chestnut hair. Finally I drew her eyes trying to convey the emotions they showed as she read Mr Rochester's desperate pleas to Jane, the conflicting emotions she felt as she silently begged Jane to listen to the man and stay but at the same time urging her to and keep her self respect. The long curved eye lashes completed the drawing; her face would always be beautiful to me because of the kindness she had shown.

I called her name, breaking the spell, but the look on her face was a new kind of magic as I showed her the drawing. "Oh, Blaise, it's amazing, picture perfect." The delight on her face was all I needed.


	5. Hope

Blaise became the friend I wanted to see, him more than any of the others. I loved Harry, Ginny, Neville and Luna even Ron although I wasn't his favourite person right now. Ginny was good for girly talk, but there were some things I couldn't tell her. Ron was her brother although she didn't blame me like he did she still thought I should still be with him.

I saw Blaise more and more, doing my homework in the same quiet corner with him, being careful not to attract attention. My marks didn't go down if anything they got better, most of the time we sat in silence enjoying each other's company; just like on the train.

We would meet in the Room of Requirement on the weekends; I knew Blaise spent a lot of his weekend there to stay away from the Slytherins. I would come and visit and it would always be the same, the walls would be white and in the middle there would be an easel and there would be art materials all over the room. I never saw him painting, the only time I ever saw him work was when he drew me, and I would see finished sketches and paintings but never anything in progress.

I was sitting at breakfast on Monday thinking about the lessons I had and checking through my homework. The whole hall was talking excitedly because there was a notice for the fist Hogsmeade weekend. This would also be followed by the Halloween feast.

There was a flurry of movement as the post came in, didn't look up because I wasn't expecting anything so I didn't look up. I was sitting next to Harry as Hedwig **(A/N: I have decided that Harry bought another owl and named her Hedwig as a tribute but he never loved the new one as much as** **his first.)** came down with a letter from the ministry about applying to become an auror next year. Ron had obviously got one too judging from the look on his face.

A black owl landed in front of my plate and nudged me to get my attention.

"Hello, Sedna."

I pulled off the letter around her leg. I fed her some bacon but she still stayed waiting patiently by my plate. The note was in Blaise's handwriting.

_Hermione_

_I am guessing most of your friends are using Hogsmeade as a chance to go on a date so you will be lonely. It would be nice to go with a friend because I've always spent my time in Hogsmeade alone. Scribble a reply on the back of this saying if you want to go with me or not._

_Blaise_

I grabbed a quill and wrote a hasty yes and sent Sedna on her way.

* * *

I spent all my spare time perfecting the painting of her, I copied the outline of the sketch carefully, I started off adding colour to the shelves, table and books leaving the girl in the middle blank. While I did my homework I would study things about her until they were imprinted in my mind. I saw the caramel of her eyes, the flecks of green dotted in the middle of the iris like shads of broken glass. I noted every subtle shade of brown, from the darkest shades of chocolate to the lightest shades of copper. When I was working I would use my colour charts to help create every colour as close as I could to her.

Every subtle shade was painted over the base colours, bringing the portrait to life even before it was enchanted. Finally after perfecting her pale skin and striking hazel eyes I began the last detail. Obsessively placing and shaping every russet freckle, I was finished at last. I signed my name in the top left corner of the pine wood frame and wrote the title of "A Friend" at the bottom underneath the painting. I said the spell I had been practising for weeks and she blinked.

I had found an old text book to keep her in, it was hard backed and leather bound with a buckle to keep it closed. I had cut out all the writing in the middle pages leaving only the cream borders. The painting fitted perfectly and it seemed fitting to keep her in a book when reading and quenching her eternal thirst for knowledge was the thing she loved best. For me I could just open to the right page and watch, talk to her and no one would know I wasn't working and repeating what I had learnt.

I would never have guessed that her friendship alone would no longer satisfy me. I would never have guessed that I would have fallen in love with my only friend.

They announced an upcoming Hogsmeade weekend so I went up to the owlery to give Sedna a note to send to her. On Monday I watched Sedna swoop down to her with the other owls bringing in the post, Hermione had her back to me so I couldn't see her face as she read the note. I knew it wasn't a date as I didn't think she felt the same way but I would have been crushed if she had said no. Sedna flew over to me with her reply, I saw that she had said yes and beamed. For the whole day nothing could darken my mood, I normally liked Hogsmeade because I could escape my house and sketch the landscape at peace with my thoughts, know I had a completely knew reason to look forward to the weekend.

* * *

**Hey I would like to thankyou for reading my story but please review, even if you didn't like it critism will help me improve. I don't like to nag but 74 hits and just 4 reviews is pathetic. Thankyou to Handy1994, Gerad Galdorcraeftiga, Livvi and X-Charcoalmoon-x for being those lovely people who have made me amazingly happy by reviewing. it takes 2 seconds people it's all i ask.**


	6. Nerves

I knew it wasn't a date but all week I couldn't wait for the weekend, even though I spent every evening doing homework with Bl

I knew it wasn't a date but all week I couldn't wait for the weekend, even though I spent every evening doing homework with Blaise. It was that week when I realised he was more than a friend to me. I started to notice how he looked, I had always loved his eyes but now I found myself matching every shade of blue to them. Nothing compared to the colour in his eyes. I started to love the way his fringe fell into them, his glossy black hair inviting me to run my fingers through it.

When it came to Saturday I was nervous, although I spoke to Blaise everyday this felt different. I got up early and showered before there was a rush to the bathroom. I sat with Ginny at breakfast and she asked

"Who are you going to Hogsmeade with then? Anyone special?" looking at my clothes and noting they were less casual than usual.

"Oh it's just a friend. It's not a date."

"Well if you're dressed like that he'll soon wish it was."

"Oh come on, it's hardly dressy, no different to what you, Lavender or Parvati is wearing. Besides, did I say it was a boy?"

"Ooooh trying to tell us something Hermione, and it's no different because we are all gong on dates."

"Well I'm not, and stop trying to be clever, it's just a friend."

I decided to end the conversation there and hoped she was to busy in Hogsmeade to pay attention to who I was walking around with.

I walked through the entrance with all the others with huge butterflies, when I saw him my stomach flipped. He saw me and smiled, the smile I had grown to love and recently done anything to see. We had agreed to walk alone and meet somewhere quiet so no one would see us. I walked with the others feeling his eyes on my back the whole time.

* * *

I had been nervous about the weekend, I liked her so much but I was sure she didn't feel the same way. Whenever I saw her I just wanted to kiss her and tell her how I felt. When we sat in the library her left hand would rest on the table as she wrote. My right hand would be right be hers as I was left handed, it was all I could do to stop my self reaching out and holding it.

When I was in my dormitory and the threats started, I used to worry knowing that in a few nights I would get beaten. The hits were always where no one could see the bruises, they never gave me Chinese burns in the summer when we had short sleeves. All I needed to do was to open my book to her painting and I knew I wouldn't care anymore.

I waited for her by the doors, as I saw her walk out I thought she looked more beautiful than ever. I caught her eye and she smiled, I wanted to walk up to her and pull her close as I told her how much I loved her. I followed behind her, watching her the whole time, the only good thing in my whole life yet the thing that brought me the most pain.

We met outside the Hogshead knowing few students went there and the ones that did wouldn't notice us. We walked in and ordered some butterbeers, we sat in a corner and began to talk. We were intellectual equals, our debates covered everything and anything; searching for a topic we disagreed on, then the fun began. She talked about what she believed in passionately but my feelings were just as strong. They weren't arguments, if anything our different opinions brought us closer together.

After we had finished our drinks we left, we walked all over Hogsmeade either merging into the crowds or in deserted places where no one would see us. I never told her about the weekly beatings but she knew, she insisted we weren't seen, desperately trying to save me the pain caused if our friendship was covered. That day had been one of the happiest of my life, I remember every detail even though it was years ago.

* * *

**Hey, wow my nagging worked, thank you for all those people who made me amazingly happy by reviewing, happiness is good by the way please could you give me some more. Sorry Blaise has started to sound a bit like a stalker S he just really loves her. Sorry again the chapter is really short but the next one will be extra long to make up for it and you'll see why i want it long. haha hopefully now you'll be curious and want to read it.**


	7. Confessions

I fell deeper and deeper in love with Blaise, I got so nervous around him I would just listen to him talk and pray I answered all his questions without making a fool out of myself. I took more care of my appearance trying desperately to calm my hair and look more casual and less teacherish, more like the other girls. Ron noticed.

I had seen Ron and Lavender together in Hogsmeade and I was glad he had moved on and I hoped he had forgiven me. Then just like in sixth year they were all over each other in public, unlike sixth year I wasn't jealous. I was happy for them, I had split them up in sixth year but this time I knew Lavender wouldn't dump Ron, she came on a bit strong but that was a good thing.

One night I had finished my homework and was looking forward to a relaxed weekend, I went to bed early. I was finding it difficult to get to sleep so I lay there thinking about Blaise, I had my curtains drawn and all the other girls were asleep. All of them except Lavender and Parvati, some times they would sit on one bed and stay up gossiping just like a sleepover. They talked about boys mostly and today they were talking about Ron.

"Is Ron romantic Lavender?"

"No but I don't really mind."

"You don't seem to like him as much as you did last time."

"I'll tell you why as long as you promise not to tell anyone, not even Padma."

"I promise."

"Well the truth is I don't like Ron, I like Harry."

"But he has a girlfriend! And you are going out with one of his best friends!"

"I know but because I am going out with Ron I can move in on Harry, he wouldn't talk to me otherwise, the only downside is having to pretend to like Ron, but he's a good kisser so it's not all bad"

What a cow, I needed to tell Ron, he couldn't just carry on going out with her when she was using him.

The next morning I cornered Ron while he was alone and dragged him into an empty classroom.

"What do you want?" He demanded.

"We need to talk."

"Can't it wait, I haven't had breakfast yet, I'm hungry."

"No it's important."

"Be quick then."

"I don't know how to tell you this but, last night I heard Lavender talking to Parvati. I'm sorry Ron but Lavender is just using you, she likes Harry but she needs you to get closer to him."

"I KNEW IT" He roared. "YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS, YOU CAN'T BEAR TO SEE ME HAPPY, DID YOU WAN'T ME TO SPEND MY WHOLE LIFE PINING AFTER YOU? YOU DIDN'T WANT ME WHEN YOU COULD HAVE ME, NOW YOU DO AND YOU'RE TRYING TO SPLIT ME AND LAVENDER UP."

"No Ron it's not like that, I'm telling the truth."

"NO I'LL TELL YOU THE TRUTH, YOU'RE JUST A LIAR. DON'T THINK I HAVEN'T NOTICED YOU TARTING YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE A JEALOUS, DESPERATE, WHORE TRYING TO MAKE YOURSELF LOOK PRETTY WHEN YOU'RE NOT. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I SAW IN YOU, I DON'T KNOW HOW ANYONE COULD EVER LOVE YOU. YOU'LL DIE ALONE JUST A SAD, UGLY, MUDBLOOD."

I gasped and ran out of the room, tears streaming down my face. I ran straight to the Room of Requirement knowing that Blaise would be in there already. He was lying in his back with his sketch book propped on his stomach as he drew, he saw me, smiled and but his sketch book down. I ran straight to him, I lay next to and buried my face in his chest, soaking his jumper with my tears. I lay there sobbing and breathing in his smell as I tried to calm down.

* * *

When she came in my stomach flipped as usual, she ran over to me and collapsed with her head on my chest and her face hidden. It was then I realised she was crying. I held her tenderly and stroked her silky hair trying to comfort her. This is what I had wanted to do for so long but I had never imagined it like this. It wasn't just love I felt as we lay there, it was hate and anger. I wanted to hurt whoever had done this to her, I wanted to hurt them badly.

It was a while before she stopped crying, when the sobs started to quieten and become less frequent I asked "Who did this to you?" she looked up at me, her eyes red and puffy, her eyelashes stuck together and tears still running down her face, she whispered one word "Ron" I knew it I thought bitterly, she still likes him.

"What did he do?"

She explained everything, about Lavender and how she had tried to tell him. She told me every word he said, fresh tears leaking out of the corner of her eyes. I hated him, how could he do this? How could he say those things? How could he call her a mudblood?

"He's wrong Hermione."

"No he isn't, I'm just ugly, and how could anyone love me? I'm bossy, a control freak, a know-it-all, a mudblood."

"You are not." I cried "You're beautiful, intelligent, kind and caring. You saved me when life wasn't worth living. You came and showed me kindness when all the world had ever thrown at me was cruelty. You brought light and beauty into my dark, ugly life. You gave me reason to get up in the morning. You showed me the most amazing thing of all, love"

"Thank you but I know you don't mean it, no one can love me I am too much of a show off who thinks everyone is beneath me."

"Ron didn't say that, no one did."

"He didn't have to, everything he said was true."

"If that was the case then I wouldn't be here."

"Huh?"

"You're the smartest which of the age and you still can't see it."

"See what?"

"Don't you get it? _I_ love you."

"You do?"

"Yes, I have for a long time but I guess it's wasted, if everything Ron said was true then you love him."

"I don't Blaise, as the smartest wizard you should see, I love _you._"

"You do?"

"Yes."

"Then that's all I need."

She smiled and I pulled her closer, tipped her face towards mine and leant in to kiss her, she opened her mouth and the kiss deepened. She pulled away and looked up at me smiling; she reached up and began to play with my hair.

"Hey, Blaise?"

"Yes?" I replied still deliriously happy that she loved me, as I wiped away the remaining tears from her face.

"When did you first realise how you felt about me?"

"When I drew you."

"Are we going to tell anyone?"

"Only if you want us to."

"Will the Slytherins hurt you more if we do?"

"I don't care as long as I have you."

"But I care; I don't want you to get hurt because of me."

"Do you care that much that you don't want to tell anyone? Not even your friends?"

"Yes."

"Do what you think right; I don't have any friends to tell."

"I love you."

I smiled as I looked down at her, still with her head on the wet patch on my chest.

"I love you too."

* * *

**This is not the last chapter!! But i have had this one in my brain since chapter 1 and i fanally got 2 write it yay! Sorry if it's too cheesy for your liking i'll try and cut down on it in any more of my long romantic chapters. I am going away for a week so i wont update for a while so i thought i would leave you this chapter as a leaving present. I hope i come back to lots of reviews! thank you for reading so far. Enjoy it!!**


	8. Questions

Things in the Gryffindor common room got more and more awkward; I just couldn't believe what Ron had said

Things in the Gryffindor common room got more and more awkward; I just couldn't believe what Ron had said. Harry knew something had changed but didn't know what; the only person I had told was Ginny and she was disgusted with Ron. All the time I saw her with him despite what he had done, I couldn't bear to see it knowing that she didn't want him. I started to notice the way she looked at Harry, when Ron wasn't there she would try and talk to him and flirt; once I had seen one thing I saw more and more and more. Harry knew nothing about girls and didn't notice, Ginny did but I had already warned her.

My only escape was Blaise; we met in quiet places where no one would see us together. No body could find out about us, it was too dangerous for Blaise as he would be punished by the Slytherins. We would lie in The Room of Requirement and talk; our debates were affectionate and less heated.

Soon after we got together, just before the sheet went round for people to write whether they were staying for Christmas, a notice went up. The teachers had decided that because the first true year of being free from Voldemort in over two decades, there would be another Yule Ball.

Like the last time only fourth years and above were allowed to go unless invited by one in those years. The school was very excited except I knew I wouldn't be able to go with Blaise. A few days a sheet went round and nearly everyone above third year stayed. Ginny was asked by Harry, Lavender by Ron and Luna by Neville.

It was a Saturday and as usual I walked into The Room of Requirement to find Blaise waiting for me. This time he wasn't drawing, he had started to paint and use pastels in front of me, but today he was just sitting looking nervous.

I sat down next to him and he put his arm round my shoulder, I nestled into him and we sat in silence. A few times he opened his mouth and drew in a breath as if about to say something. After the tenth time of him closing his mouth and looking annoyed with himself I spoke.

"Blaise, are you ok?"

"Yeah, fine just enjoying your company" I smiled but I wasn't satisfied with his answer.

Merlin I was such a coward, I don't why I couldn't just ask her. She was my girlfriend, why would she say no? With that thought I drew in another deep breath and turned towards her.

"Hermione?"

"Yes?"

"Umm well I wasn't exactly telling the truth earlier, I am enjoying your company but I am not fine."

"What's wrong?"

"Well nothing in particular I was just wondering if you were staying at school over Christmas."

"Yes I am, why?"

"Would you like to go to the ball with me?" There I said it I just hoped she would say yes, Merlin she's not smiling and she's not answered me. "You don't have to go with me; don't feel pressured because I'm your boyfriend."

"No, Blaise that's not it. I would love to go with you I really but I don't want you getting hurt because of us."

"I can deal with it Hermione, I love you and don't care if the Slytherins know; they'll just have to live with out. We shouldn't have to hide it from everyone; your friends deserve to know. I can't of a better way of revealing it than going to the ball together."

"But, they could kill you Blaise, they're wizards."

"And so am I. I'm not helpless Hermione, I can fight back; I'm sick of accepting every kick and punch like a stray dog. I will never ever let anyone harm if that's what you're worried about."

"No, I'm not worried about me; I really really want to with you I just don't want you doing anything stupid.

"You saying no would hurt me more than anything more than they can ever do to me."

"I would never dream of saying no, I just wanted to make sure you knew what the consequences could be first. I don't want anything to happen to you, when you're with them I always worry what they are doing to you, how many more bruises you can take."

"Is that a yes then?"

"Yes Blaise, I would love to go with you."

I grinned, I couldn't believe it, not only had she said yes but she really cared about me.

We spent the rest of the day together, both excited at the prospect of Christmas together. Later that night as I lay in my dorm I brought out my old Transfiguration text book and opened it to page 159. I watched the girl I loved, at the same time still not believing she was mine. It was just too good to be true, yet true it was, I was just so lucky


	9. Midnight Blue

Before I knew it the Christmas holidays had arrived and Ginny and I decided to go into Hogsmeade together for Christmas shopping. When we had finished the presents, the usual flossing mints for my parents, a book on the greatest aurors of all time, a box of 100 chocolate frogs for Ron as a few new cards had been introduced and he had so far failed to get the one about himself and for Ginny I bought a pair of earrings. I had asked my parents to get a blue leather pad designed for watercolours that I had seen in a muggle art shop for Blaise.

"Hermione, do you mind if we shop for a dress now? It's just that the ball is coming up and I want to look good for Harry."

"No I don't mind at all, I need a dress too." I replied. "I can't be disappointing my date either." I added slyly.

"What!? You have a date!? Who!?"

"You needn't be so surprised I am allowed to have one, anyway it's not just a date Gin, a boyfriend"

"Since when!? You could have told me, who is it? How long have you been together?"

"I didn't tell you because you would tell Harry because you tell each other everything and Harry would tell Ron. We have been going out since November but I'm still not going to tell you who."

"Why? I won't tell anyone I promise."

"No you'll find out on Christmas Eve like everyone else, he'll be easy enough to spot because of that stupid new rule. You know the one where all the couples have to wear the exact same colour as each other."** (A/N: Don't ask where that came from, my mind works in mysterious ways but as you will see later it fits in quite well.)**

"Oh yeah that one, I was just going to get my dress and ask for a sample of the material so Harry can charm his dress robes to match."

"Good idea, it's so stupid I don't know why they thought of it, it's pointless."

"Well it's going to be colourful as no couple will be the same colour as anyone else, Harry and I have decided on green because it suits my hair and matches his eyes. What about you and the mystery man?"

"Either indigo or dark blue." I prayed that Ginny just thought it was because it was a nice colour and she had never noticed Blaise's eyes.

We entered the shop and began to search for the perfect dress for the perfect evening. Ginny found an emerald green strapless sating dress with a beaded bodice and a knee length skirt. I found a mole skin** (A/N: the fabric not actual animal fur)** midnight blue dress with wide straps, a v neck and silver sequins with a skirt that came to my ankles.

We left the shop with our dresses and sample material for Blaise and Harry. Walking back to the castle with arms loaded with presents we talked excitedly about the upcoming ball.

* * *

I awaited the approach of the ball with a certain amount of anxiety. Apart from being and outsider and not becoming a deatheater in time I had never really done anything to truly anger the Slytherins. This ball would be when I showed how I really felt, I had always been careful in the past but Hermione made me almost reckless.

She had changed my life in three months, I had been bitter that I had been born into a prominent deatheater family. I had spent my whole life a coward, trying to postpone becoming a deatheater by saying I wanted to finish school first rather than saying no and facing up to my actions. I had been too scared to show where my loyalties really lay, too scared to say no to Voldemort and too scared to fight for what I believed in. I was too scared to stand up to the Slytherins that made my life at school hell, the ones that meant I was constantly bruised and aching. I was born into a proud strong family but I couldn't live up to my name.

I was like the Cowardly Lion, just waiting to be given courage like it was something to be eaten or a possession; even though I knew that wasn't possible. I was wrong, oh so wrong. I had been given courage, in the form of a clever brown haired girl; she was all the courage I needed. It was because of that girl that I wasn't only nervous about revealing our relationship, I was excited. This was my chance to prove myself, to show I was no longer a coward. I was Blaise Zabini, standing up for what I believe in, breaking free from the shackles I had been in my whole life.

A week before the ball Hermione gave me a cutting of midnight blue material. "It's from my dress, your dress robes need to be this colour exactly."

"It's beautiful; you chose well it will look amazing on you."

"Thanks Blaise, the ball is next week it starts at seven."

"I know."

"Well Ginny, Lavender, Parvati and I are getting ready together so all four of us are meeting our dates by the doors. Harry, Ron and Seamus will be there so stand with them."

"Easier said than done."

That was how I found myself standing by the door in my finest dress robes, charmed to match Hermione's dress. I was waiting anxiously holding a small bunch of flowers consisting of two blue lilies and one white rose. We heard their voices and Harry, Ron, Seamus and I all straightened up expectantly.

* * *

**Hey, you might have noticed that considering I submitted chapter 8 that I was back, clearly not as i only got 1 review. More apologies as usual, firstly alot of you don't like it that Blaise is being bullied i cant chage that cause it's kind of important. Secondly some people have said i have been overly dramatic, sorry I didn't realise I was trying not to be boring, I will try and cut down. Anyway the lack of reviews was shamef full and I kand of want to reach 30 by the end of the story wich will be chapter 13 I think so i will steal an idea, make me happy and follow the arrows**

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	10. You Pass

We got ready in our dorm with Ginny, we all chatted excitedly as we got ready

We got ready in our dorm with Ginny, we all chatted excitedly as we got ready. My make up didn't take long but my hair did, we spent half an hour just trying to tame it. Finally Ginny put on a necklace with a small green leaf shaped pendant, I put on a fine silver chain with a silver crescent moon and tinny sapphire in the corner, my parents had bought it for me when I got my letter about Hogwarts. We walked down the stairs and saw them, Ron's Lavender dress robes clashed terribly with his hair, the colour Seamus red robes looked no where near as good on him as it did on Parvati. The green suited Harry well but everything paled in comparison to Blaise and his midnight blue robes, his eyes met mine and he smiled and held out a bunch of flowers.

"Please tell me this is your idea of a joke and your real date has taken Polyjuice potion." Ginny whispered in my ear.

"Sorry Gin, this is him, as real as they come."

We walked over to our dates and I noticed Ginny wasn't the only one looking on in disbelief. I didn't care; all I cared about was the guy holding my hand, the guy standing right by my side.

"Hermione you look beautiful." I looked up blushing.

"Thank you and I love the flowers."

"I think your friends want an explanation."

"They can wait."

"You're right, do you want a drink?"

The hall looked amazing, there were the usual trees but the ceiling had been enchanted to snow, the snow vanished the moment it touched something but the effect was beautiful.

We started to dance, the first songs were all fast and after an hour we got tired and stopped for another drink. We walked over to the other who were sitting down, when we got there Ginny said "Hermione I need a bit of fresh air do you want to come?" Before I had a chance to reply she grabbed my arm and pulled me outside, leaving Blaise alone with a rather murderous looking Harry and Ron.

"So what's the deal with Zabini?" Ginny demanded.

"We met this year and got talking, he's nice I really really like him Gin."

"That's not the point, he's a Slytherin, are you sure that you can trust him?"

"He's not like that, he hates his house and they hate him, he gets fresh bruises every week."

"That doesn't stop him being a deatheater."

"His arm's clean, you can check if you like, he wanted to join the order but knew he wouldn't survive the war if he did."

"He could've been a spy."

"He didn't know about Snape and do you think he would be trusted if he just turned up and offered his help?"

"True, but are you sure that you like him?"

"Yes, I'm positive, does he pass now?"

She smiled "Yes, with flying colours, I'll just see if the boys are done interrogating him yet."

She came back with an incredulous look on her face and said "You won't believe this." She led me back to see Ron, Harry and Blaise not only talking laughing like old friends.

A slow song came on and all the couples walked onto the dance floor, Blaise took my hand and brought me into his arms as we started to dance. As I rested my head on his chest I whispered "What did you say to them?"

"Just the truth, delivered with my usual irresistible charm." For the rest of the night we danced, when it ended Blaise walked me back to the Gryffindor common room. "I had a really nice time tonight, thank you Blaise."

"It's no problem; I should thank you for making this the first dance I've ever actually enjoyed."

"Well, good night."

"Night"

"Be careful wont you."

"Of course."

He pulled me into a long good night kiss and walked off down the corridor.

* * *

She walked down the stairs and my stomach clenched, she looked amazing. I took her hand aware of the filthy looks I was getting, this would be the first time I ever had a date. The first time I didn't sit alone watching everyone else have fun, the first time I had bothered going for years.

We danced together and all I concentrated on was her, I wouldn't be able to name a single song we danced to even when they had just ended. Her dress suited her perfectly; the blue dress was like the night sky with silver sequin stars and her moon necklace. The lighting made her skin look paler than usual, snow white and unblemished; she looked just like a moon goddess.

We stopped dancing and her cheeks were flushed, I smiled at the way even when she was tired, sad or angry she still looked beautiful. We grabbed some butter beers and she started walking over to her friends, oblivious to the dagger like looks they were sending my way. We reached them and I was relieved that at least I had Hermione to stop her friends if they tried to swing at me. Then Ginny took Hermione outside leaving me with Ron and Harry.

"Sooo…" I laughed nervously.

"Shut up Zabini." growled Ron.

"What do you want with Hermione? 'Cause I swear if your intentions are anything but honourable, Ron and I will personally rip you limb from limb." menaced Harry.

"I love her; I swear I won't hurt her."

"Why should we trust you?" demanded Ron.

"Because I'm telling the truth."

"Show us your left arm." ordered Harry.

I rolled up my sleeve and showed them my arm was bare.

"How did you get all those bruises?"

"I'm not exactly popular in my house."

"You mean Malfoy did this to you."

"Him and others."

"Why?"

"I don't fit in and I don't agree with their pureblood ideas."

"Why not?"

"Because your blood doesn't make you any better than anyone else, I mean look at Hermione, she's filth in their eyes and yet no one can beat her. No offence Ron your blood is purer than half of the Slytherins but without Hermione your grades would be poor."

"None taken it's a fair point."

"But you are obviously getting roughed up already, going out with her is practically suicide, what's in it for you?"

"Her, I love her and don't care what they do they don't scare me anymore."

"You have correctly answered all our questions, what do you reckon Ron?"

"He's all right I guess."

"He's better than Krum." Ron's expression rapidly darkened to a look of hatred.

"Wait a minute. She went out with Krum? The Victor Krum?"

"Yeah, she and Vicky went to the Yule Ball together." I burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?"

"Just the thought of Duck Feet dancing."

I did my best impression on Krum's terrible dancing and then clumsily apologising for stepping on her feet in thickly accented poor English. We were all laughing so hard we didn't notice Hermione and Ginny come back with disbelieving looks on their faces.

As the couples moved onto the dance floor Ron hissed in my ear "Yeah, alright we like you but it doesn't mean you won't spend several months in St Mungo's if you hurt her." I smiled and led Hermione onto the dance floor.

The very last dance was another slow one, I swayed with Hermione in my arms and her head tucked under my chin. Her soft hair tickled my neck as I breathed in the smell of her perfume and shampoo. The night had passed so quickly but I didn't want the song to end, I took her to her common room and said. I lay in bed waiting for my punishment to come but it never did.

* * *

**Thank you for the reviews but I need some more to get to my goal, i know you were looking forward to the dance I made it especially long and I hope it doesn't dissapoint. I have a question which is that we are nearing the the end and i have two possible endings and I either end it with the possibility of a sequel a few years later or it stays the same length but i leave it at a close and don't write another HGBZ again. I would like to know and if you don't tell me i just wont finish it i'll leave it at a horrible cliff hanger and you'll always want to know what happens and you will never find out so please tell me if you want a sequel or not.  
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	11. Family

I was woken up early by Ginny running in from her dorm and jumping on my bed and shouting "Hermione

I was woken up early by Ginny running in from her dorm and jumping on my bed and shouting "Hermione! Wake up, it's Christmas!"

"Oh, Hi Gin. Merry Christmas"

"I brought up my presents so we could open ours together, then we can go say hi to the boys."

She picked up a brightly wrapped present off my pile, handed it to me and beamed. "Open this first it's from me." Before I did I pulled the one from me out of Ginny's pile and handed it to her.

"Wow thanks for the eagle feather quill Gin, it's really nice and I needed a new one."

"No problem, I love the earrings, thanks."

I got the usual jumper and basket of mince pies from Mrs Weasley, this year's one was green with a quill on it, from Hagrid I got some treacle which would need softening over the fire. Harry bought me a planner dating from the first of March to the end of June. Everyday had several one hour slots so I could plan my revision for every single day individually, I could even put in which specific area of each subject I would study, at the back I could fill in my exam time table. Luna had given me a year's subscription to the Quibbler, which now printed factual articles and news. Neville had given me a young Mimbulus Mimbletonia which he had got from his original plant as he knew I had taken a huge interest in the very rare plant, he had included care instructions.

At the bottom of the pile was an unlabeled package I had saved until last because I thought it was from Blaise. I opened it excitedly intrigued to know what he had got me to find a book on how to become and register to be an animagus along with an application form. It was from Ron, there was a note attached.

Dear Hermione,

I originally bought this for you for your birthday but I was too angry to give it to you, I figured you would like the challenge; maybe you could help us once you achieve it. Anyway I think I owe you an apology, I've been a jerk all year and when I got over you you told me about Lavender. I shouted some horrible things and I want you to know I didn't mean any of them. Lavender tried to kiss Harry last night while Ginny and I were talking. I've been a real idiot and I have been to stubborn to admit it, it was only last night when I realised how much I cared about you getting hurt that I brought myself to admit that. I'm sorry.

Ron

I ran downstairs to find the boys waiting for us in the common room, Ron was eating a chocolate frog and watching the picture of himself on the card behave in a very Ron like way. Before he could say anything I sprinted up to him and gave him a huge hug. " 'Mione!" He shouted. I just laughed and said "Apology accepted."

* * *

I woke up and looked around relieved to find the other boys had left and I was alone in my dorm, I smiled at the sight of Hermione's writing on the top present on my pile. I moved it aside so I could open it last; I wanted to give my present to her in person.

I opened the usual presents from my family but before I opened Hermione's a grey owl flew in through the window and collapsed on the floor moulting. It was carrying a package but I didn't recognise the writing, I opened it with caution in case Hermione's friends had decided I wasn't to be trusted after all. I found a large quantity of home baked mince pies which I eyed suspiciously, a hand knitted indigo jumper with a coffee bean on it and a note.

Dear Blaise

My name is Molly Weasley, every one calls me Molly, I assume you know my son who is on your year Ronald Weasley and my daughter Ginevra who is the year below. I have heard the news that you and Hermione are now together. I would like to welcome you into the family and you are welcome at the Burrow with Hermione. I heard you like coffee; I hope you like the jumper and enjoy the mince pies. Merry Christmas.

Mrs Molly Weasley

I smiled as I pulled on the jumper which was very warm and fitted me perfectly. I gasped as I opened Hermione's present; the paper was beautiful and of very high quality, it could only be muggle a few charms to protect it and stop wrinkling and blotting it would be perfect.

I walked into the great hall to find that there were only two tables in the middle and all the houses were mixed in together. I smiled when I saw that Hermione had saved me a place next to her, I walked over and joined them.

"Blimey, he's got a Weasley jumper!" Exclaimed Ron, I noticed he was wearing an orange one with a cannon and two C's on it, Ginny's was purple with a bat on it. Hermione and Harry were also wearing them, Harry's was red with the Elder Wand on it.

"They're a Weasley tradition." Explained Ginny. "Mum knits them every year for everyone in the family. Me, Dad, Ron, George, Charlie, Bill and even Percy though we don't know why. You should have seen it when I was in first year, there was seven people wearing them." There was a pause as everyone remembered that Fred was one of those seven people.

"How come I've got one?"

"Well obviously mum now considers you family."

After lunch we went for a snowball fight then I was invited back to the Gryffindor common room for some of Hagrid's treacle and some hot chocolate. I said goodbye to everyone and Hermione came outside with me to say goodnight when I instructed her to close her eyes. When I was sure she wasn't looking I put a gold necklace around her neck, there was a gold heart with Hermione engraved on it and a ruby on one side and other side had an emerald and Blaise. "You can open your eyes now."

"Oh wow Blaise it's beautiful." She gasped, I said goodnight and was just about to walk down the corridor when I couldn't move no matter how hard I tried. "Magic Mistletoe." She laughed, I smiled as she leant in to kiss me and free me "The perfect end to the perfect day." I murmured.

* * *

**Well this is your last chance to state your preference of sequel or no, because the next will be my horrible cliff hanger if you don't. Sorry i hope you don't mind the Christmas fluff it's just recently eveything has been all happy and i thought i would you give you a nice one because there wont be much romantic stuff for a while particularly i end up with having to write my cliff hanger.  
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	12. Tactics

They accepted him, I thought that they were just being kind because it was Christmas Day and they didn't want to spoil it by judging him. At first they were a little wary; they knew how much I liked him but they still weren't completely sure that he could be trusted. I knew it wouldn't be easy at first; but the fact they hadn't punched his lights out at the ball was a good sign. Gradually they began to see the truth behind his words; they saw that he hated Deatheaters as much as we did. They began to realise how hard it was for him to live with them and know that his family used to be them.

One day when Blaise walked in Harry and Ron were playing a rather violent chess game, he walked past and muttered "Ron if you move you're queen to G5 it's check mate."

"Thanks, I didn't see that." Ron grinned and asked "So do you play chess then Blaise?"

"Yeah I have my own set of pieces in my dorm."

"Cool, bring 'em along tomorrow."

Ron was still suspicious of Blaise but he was making an effort to be friendly for me.

The next day Blaise came in carrying a set of silver pieces, Ron and Harry were equally skilled at chess and their matches were always close, together they would make formidable opponents. To make it easier they were using half of Harry's pieces and half of Ron's and they would each control their own half as those pieces trusted them. "Blaise mate, do you mind if we play white?"

"Sure." Blaise's pieces immediately changed from silver to green as he placed them on the board.

"Best of three." He said, Harry and Ron agreed looking very confident. Within four moves Blaise had check mate and Harry and Ron were in shock with their mouths open in disbelief. Ron recovered and said "Right we aren't falling for that one again."

"The next game was longer and Harry and Ron eventually claimed victory, they relaxed visibly; they couldn't lose to Blaise. The last game lasted even longer and after an hour Harry and Ron were left with Ron's king and four of Harry's pawns. Blaise still had his king, queen both his knights and five pawns. Harry and Ron's pieces stood at the side shouting advice and encouragement, Blaise's stood watching serenely. In the end he won, Harry and Ron were gutted but bravely they congratulated him with a "Well played" Ginny and I watched them struggle giggling.

Everyday Blaise seemed reluctant to leave for more reasons than that he was having a good time, he had no new bruises but I knew why. The waiting was killing him, he was nervous knowing that this time he would be lucky if he came out of his punishment alive.

* * *

The rest of the holiday passed in a blur, at the beginning of the year I had no friends or happiness in my life; the only I had that was close to a friend was Sedna. Now I was happier than I had ever been, not only did I have five good friends; I had a girlfriend who I loved more than anything. I had been completely included into Hermione's friends, Ron was still slightly guarded but the chess had let him get to know me better. The other Gryffindors didn't mind my presence, they seemed to understand that I was different and anyone accepted by the Golden Trio was trusted.

I never spent anytime in my common room but they knew where I was, I knew I would never be forgiven for deserting the house. I lay in my bed waiting for sleep to come, waiting to slip into unconsciousness and begin the next day in my blissful holiday. School would start again soon and I wanted to savour this freedom I had been experiencing. I was just starting to drift when the thick green hangings of my four poster were ripped open, I looked up to see the sneering face of Malfoy.

"Thought we'd forgotten about you did you? Blood traitor." He spat

He pulled my hangings completely open to reveal the faces of Bole, Goyle and Nott looking menacing and cracking their knuckles. As usual I braced and readied myself however I wasn't preparing to take the blows I was preparing to fight back.

"Scared Blood Traitor?" Sneered Malfoy "Worried that Potty and Weasel and your mudblood girlfriend aren't here to save your neck?" He turned to the others and asked "Do you reckon Granger would turn up to his funeral? Would she cry? And if he somehow miraculously manages to survive do you reckon she would still love him if he was a cripple who had to eat through a straw?"

"Leave her out of this Malfoy." I snarled.

"Aww are you trying to protect her? Do you think it would impress her if you died in her name?" He smirked and turned to the others again. "Fists, wands or both?"

"Both" grinned Nott excitedly.

"Right then, Bole, Goyle use fists, Nott and I will use our wands."

I was ready for them, I had my wand under my pillow because I had know this was coming, what's more I had the element of surprise. Before they had a chance to react I had disarmed them and put them in a full body bind. They looked up at me from the floor as I stood up at them smiling. "I believe you boys have underestimated me. Now I have a lesson to teach you, leave me alone and unless you want to stay like this for the rest of your lives blink." The all did very deliberately. "Well tough because I personally think it will take a night like this before my message finally sinks in so good night boys." Before I went back to bed I cast one last spell, one Hermione invented and only she and I knew how to perform. There faces were now covered in purple boils that read MONG, My cousin John's insult of choice, I smiled rolled over and went to sleep thinking I would be well out of the way when they stumbled across a mirror.

* * *

**Hey i am back and i am so sorry i didn't tell you i was going away again so it has been over a week since i updated, i tried to get a chapter and a note up before i left but didn't have the time and if you want to punish me u can shout at me in your reviews (as long as what you say about the story is nice and not prejudiced because of my lateness) Oh and John sorry i nicked your name cus i realised you looked quite similar to Blaise except you're pale and i was gonna put twat as my insult but me and Hannah decided it had 2 be Mong cus of you. I hope you don't mind.**


	13. Close Call final chapter

After Christmas the work and stress started to build up, although the exams were in a few months we were working like they were next week. Blaise and I became more and more irritable as the pressure to perform and live up to our reputations was dragging us down. It all started with a bad day, both of us had been set an essay in every subject, four essays each of them two foot long. I noticed Blaise had made a mistake in his potions essay.

"Blaise, a bezoar is from a goat not a sheep; you should know that from first year." I said some what harshly.

"Well I'm sorry I don't remember every single thing I've ever learnt." He snapped back then added "Know-it-all" under his breath. I would have let his angry reply go if it wasn't for that, over the years the insult had ceased to hurt as much it still stung but I was used to it, coming from him it was like a slap round the face.

"Well at least it doesn't get in the way of me having friends." I knew immediately that I had gone too far, just from the look in his eyes I could see how much my low blow had hurt. I wanted to take it all back; to apologise, tell him I didn't mean it but something stopped me. I wanted him to pay for calling me a know-it-all, anger, pain and stress stopped me from seeing clearly that what I had said was far far far worse.

"What did you say?"

"You heard, you should count yourself lucky that I took pity on you when you were sitting all alone and pathetic." My head was screaming at me but my mouth was out of my control.

"You're not the only person to take pity, Ron's right no one really wants a know-it-all girlfriend let alone one like you, an insufferable one."

With that he stormed out he stormed out taking his work with him, one small sentence had kicked off the worst argument we had ever had.

After he left I was too proud and angry to run after him although the part of me that had been screaming a moment before was practically begging now. The pain that followed as he glared at me in the corridors was unbelievable; it was ironic that the only person who could comfort me was the one causing me pain. I immersed myself in work; driving all thoughts of him out with knowledge of the exams, it was too painful to do anything else.

Before I knew it the exams arrived, the only question I knew I got wring was in transfiguration I came out and kicked myself nearly crying in frustration knowing that he would have told me everything I needed to hear to make me feel better. I made up for the written exam in the practical when the examiner noticed I was a registered animagus. That was another thing I had thrown myself into as a distraction, I was so determined I had achieved it in record timing. He was clearly impressed when he asked me to demonstrate, my form was an otter to match my patronus. The exams ended leaving a month until we got our results.

* * *

I went straight outside, it was dark and the black sky flashed white with forks of lightning. The storm portrayed my anger, the thunderous rolls mirroring the feelings coursing through my mind. Each drop of the rain I had loved since I was a small boy soothed and cooled me, offering me comfort. After walking around the lake twice my anger had evaporated and been replaced by a feeling of emptiness and pain.

When I got to my dorm the realisation of what had happened truly hit home, I collapsed onto my bed hoping that soon I would wake up from a nightmare. When the morning came I found myself with tears streaming down my face, I was still fully clothed proving that last might wasn't a dream like I hoped. What Hermione had said hurt more than the damage Malfoy and his gang of knuckles had ever inflicted. They had cracked ribs on several occasions and my nose would never be straight again.

All too quickly the exams came, the months of work paid of and they went ok. A month later we got our results I got all O's and Harry told me that Hermione did as well, I felt that I should be hugging her and congratulating her not getting told by her best friend and missing her. The next week was graduation and there was going to be a party, I made up my mind about what I was going to do there and then.

I got ready anxiously knowing I had to look good, recent months had passed like a long nightmare. My life had gone back to how it was before I met her except there were two differences, I was no longer covered in bruises and it is far harder to live in solitude when you have had perfect happiness with someone.

I walked up behind her as a slow song came on; I whispered in her ear "Can we dance?" She spun around and fell into my arms, I held her tightly as she began to sob onto my chest. "Blaise, I am so sorry, I have missed you so much. The past few months have been…" I cut her off because I knew too well how the past few months had been, torture. "It's my turn to apologise for being a stubborn got, I've missed you too."

"Let's never do that again it hurt too much."

"I know. I was a close call. Too close."

She buried her face in my chest and I finally felt at peace for the first time since I had walked out, just being able to hold her reassured me that she would always be there.

* * *

**Well that's the end it's taken a while and theres been a few unexpected turns along the way, the usual apologies for the cheese and lateness it's just i found the last couple of chaters really hard so before the sequel i am going to write a 3 chapter Hermione Neville because i love him almost as much as Blaise. Well i think thanyous are in order for my favouriters and reviewers im particular Mae513 and x-charcoal-moon-x for your amazing regular reviews which i looked forward to everytime and also to BrokliManda, JillianUnleashed, Dryad121, Keelycal, hphglover, vampgirl725, olympia, mcc, twinfeathers, Livvi, gerad galdorcraeftiga, Dracofan2284, SerpentClara, Musiqa, Padd-Foott, Phoenix4freedom and beckychelle, sorry for the acceptance speech but it had to be done, please review i dont mind if you haven't before i just want your opinion on my first ever fic so thankyou and follow the arrows and make me rele rele deliriously happy that you reviewed even if it isnt all that positive thank you so much for reading my fic!!.**

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	14. Notice

**A/N: Hey, sorry if you thought this was a new chapter, it isn't it's even better!**

**I am just letting you know I have started writing that sequel I promised (sorry if you already know) it's called Rippling Water so please R and R. Tell me what you think! Thanks again for reading this story and I hope you enjoy the second and final part!**

**Eyrial (Mad-sandwich)  
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